I often meet another Mum at the playground and so far they have all been really friendly. The Mum's I have met so far often have a kid around Lucy's age as this playground is great for toddlers. It has smaller play equipment and the slide is not too tall.
We often get to chatting about how old our kids are and about we where we live. I am enjoying a smaller community feeling. I am bumping into mothers at playgrounds and then again at the shops and again at the library. Arana Hills, where we live is not tiny by any means. But it is small enough to feel like a community. My church is in the next suburb and is only a 5 min drive away. I live near many from my church and I am even attending a local Mothers group with my kids, with other Mum's from my church. I am starting to feel really settled in our Arana Hills home.
I was telling this one mother about my move from America. I was so thankful for her ability to look into my world with compassion and understanding. She asked me how it was for me to settle back into Australia again. I told her honestly it has taken me quite some time. I have been back in Australia for 5 months and I am just now feeling like I am settled. Like I am at home. This kind mother told me how she moved to Cairns (up the top of my State) for a year. When she moved back it took her awhile to feel like she was home again and was able to fit into life in Brisbane. She pointed out that she moved within the same State, for only a year! Let alone me moving from the other side of the world after living there for 7 YEARS!
She said I must have felt quite displaced after living overseas for so long and now living in Australia again. Displaced was exactly what I have very recently felt.
I felt so understood. Which was so encouraging. When you feel understood it gives you the courage to go on. You feel as if you are OK, to be adjusting to a new home, to be experiencing culture shock in your own country. When someone is kind and understanding it helps me to overcome my worst enemy. Which is to be hard on myself!
Like Joan from church said I need to be kind to myself. For when I am kind to myself I am then able to be kind to others.
Like MY Mum. Whom I so long to be kind to. Whom I so long to be understanding to. Who is the very reason why we felt God asked us to move back to Australia. Now if you read this don't tell her if you know her as we want to preserve her independence. I have always longed to honour Mum but sadly I grew up with a Dad who disrespected her. He talked down to her. Which he passed onto my brother and then to me. But the bible tells us to honour your mother and father and it will go well with you. I teach this to Micah and now he is watching me.... and soon Lucy will be too. NOW I need to role model this verse to Micah by respecting my own mother.
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| Lucy and Micah with their Gran on Christmas Day |
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| Jeremy LOVES my Mum. He is so respectful of her. He is my greatest teacher in honouring her. He honours his parents so well! |
Just over a week ago I had to help Mum clean up and de-clutter the house as my brother's new fiancee' was coming to stay. I was excited to help Mum. Yet nervous as I can be bossy. I can try to take over. Which is totally disrespectful! But God helped me through it and like Joan also said, God can change her heart. Let's just say my Mum like to collect things. A LOT of things. But with a wood stove, pets, red dirt and dust it is hard to keep things nice and clean.
BUT hallelujah! She let me throw away broken ornaments. She let me take home some stained table cloths so I can soak them ( since she was running out of dry places to hang laundry due to all the rain we had). She even let me throw away huge and very stained stuffed animals!!!!
Mum and I were a team. She hugged me when I offered to help with her laundry. I encouraged her that she would win an award if she was ever on the Hoarders buried alive show (TLC's reality TV show in the USA). She felt encouraged. I felt encouraged to be helping her with respect.
WOOOHOOOO! My kids were right there with us the whole time too. I owe it all to God. He helped me to do this. He helped me to help my mother without getting frustrated and snapping at her.
I NEED HIS help! I need his help to be kind to myself so I can to be kind to others. Especially my Mum! God helped me to be understanding. To understand although some ornaments are broken they are ok to keep if you just can not part with them yet. Like the Asian ornament my brother gave to Mum years ago. It only had a chip in the corner and I hid that corner behind another ornament. Then together we put it on display.
I pray for our relationship to grow and strengthen. I love my Mum. There is no other Mum like her. She is kind and caring. She has always and continues to give me quality time. She put years of hard work into raising me, mostly on her own. Now it is my turn to give back to her. It is my turn to help her as she ages. To give her the respect she deserves through the love and encouragement that she needs.
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| My wedding day. January 28th, 2006 |
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